Sunday, December 3, 2006

Cheerio Mga Ati; Isang Kwentong Airport

My relatives from The Land Down Under had just arrived yesterday.


Of course it's given that balikbayans = pasalubong.

My aunt gave me a slightly used Samsung flip phone, Canon printer and scanner as a Christmas present.

How about that bitches?!

My other aunt meanwhile, promised me a shopping spree once we start hitting the malls.



On our way to the airport, we passed by the Villamor Airbase (naturally, since we're taking C-5). At that moment, I was half-expecting Adie to run in to the middle of the highway and shout "Poli" at the top his lungs.

The plane from Sydney should land at 5:00 p.m.; we are already in the waiting room by 4:50. My father and I went in the waiting area, bought food from Jollibee and looked for a place to sit. In front of us was a television showing the passengers emerging from the gates.

I never thought that that would be very entertaining.

Apparently, the passengers don't know that there is a camera monitoring them. So you would see people picking their noses, men adjusting their crotches and women tripping in the slanting walk way.

I was just staring at the screen and laughing my brains out; people must've thought I inhaled three boxes of ecstasy diluted in a jar of rugby.

The two ati's in front of me meanwhile, were chatting about their tribulations en route to the airport. They're from Davao according to one of the ati's. She said that she hasn't slept for almost two days now. Silence. The conversation veered abruptly towards Pinoy Dream Academy.

Ati 1:Ay naku itaga mo sa bato 'day, si Yeng ang mananalo! Aba, no. 1 sa WRR tapos no. 3 sa Love Radio ang kanta niya!

Ati 2: Oo nga! Gusto ko si Panky kahit mataba siya. Ang ganda ng quality ng boses eh.

Ati 1: Ay naku ang gwapo-gwapo talaga ni Ronnie! Crush ko siya!

Ati 2: ... oo siguradong maraming bobotong mga taga Pampanga sa kanya.

Ati 2: E si Rosita?

Ati 1: Ay naku! Nakakainis yang si Rosita na yan! Feeling! Simulang-simula pa lang ng PD-Eeeh ayoko na sa kanya! Kainis talaga!

The conversation ended when one of the Ati 1 shamelessly sang Hawak Kamay.

Laban kayo? Wala pang tulog yan ng halos dalawang araw.

While my father and I were very calm and patient, other people kept pacing back and forth and shoving their faces on the screen to see whether their relatives are about to go out. Every now and then you will hear a shriek of Ayan na! Ayan na siya! Siya yan diba? Tara na! Dali, dali, dali...

Di naman sila excited.

Most people were in their casual attire. Some looked fresh from the palengke and the construction site. But the scariest of them all are the Japayukis dressed in pink gowns with matching shades. They thought they looked great; the two ati's in front me thought otherwise.

Ang magnanakaw, galit sa kapwa magnanakaw; ang ati galit sa japayuki.

After a few minutes, a woman who looked like an OFW emerged. And from nowhere, a little bitch girl came running toward the woman. She hugged her and burst into tears. The father meanwhile walked slowly towards his wife, hugged him and made beso-beso.

Anak? Dekada '70?...Feng Shui?

Ang mga Pilipino talaga, kapag maraming taong nanonood eh nagiging mga ta-artits bigla.

I didn't realize that it was already 7:20 p.m. when my relatives started exitting Gate 2. Upon meeting them, I greeted and shook hands with them. Artista rin pala ako.

As we were walking toward our car, an ati went in the middle of the way, grabbed her camera and shouted Picture! Picture! Little did the ati know that directly behind her was a van on reverse. My father was about to signal the ati when I told him to hush. "Let the bitch die", I told him. Okay, That's not my exact words; it's more like Hayaan mong masagasaan si ati. Masyado kasing excited!

That's it for now!

My next post would probably be about my student in LTS who I think is Lucifer's daughter.

If my assumption is correct... I conclude that she is Betty's sister.


Anonymous Szusza said...

Artista ka talaga, Poli! Everyone knows that. xD

I'll be waiting for your dual comedy act with Icheal on TV. Preferably in a midnight slot. You can kick out Kuya Germs for all I care. xD

December 3, 2006 at 8:18:00 PM GMT+8  
Anonymous amae said...

Ang sakit ng panga ko kakatawa.

December 3, 2006 at 9:00:00 PM GMT+8  
Anonymous joshua said...

hahahaha!!! AMP... ang cute naman n2 sana lang talaga namatay na yung dalawang ati.. hehehe
Atska kaya maliit ung font nung akin.. para walang magbasa.. hehehe
sneer ka diyan.. umaga lang un kc l8 ako..!

December 3, 2006 at 10:43:00 PM GMT+8  
Anonymous Keshia said...

Nasagasaan ba? Tsk tsk. Pero sana kinaibigan mo si ati diba. Parang cool siya. Yun ba yung kumanta ng Hawak Kamay?

December 4, 2006 at 12:04:00 AM GMT+8  
Blogger Allan said...

Joshua: Hindi ako yung nagsabi ng sneer. Si Arvee yun.

To Joshua and Keshia: Yung ati na muntik masagasaan, iba dun sa dalawang ati na nag-uusap tungkol sa PDA.

December 4, 2006 at 11:17:00 AM GMT+8  
Anonymous Keshia said...

Ang dami namang ati sa airport.

December 4, 2006 at 1:29:00 PM GMT+8  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

syempre, basta katarantaduhan at mga ati, detalyadong-detalyado ang pagkakaalala mo.

haha. go, mga ati.
kayo ang mga nagpapakulay ng buhay ni allan.


December 5, 2006 at 10:04:00 PM GMT+8  
Anonymous edree said...

Poli talaga o...sobrang funny...sayang di nangyari yung ine-expect mo kay Adie...haha! that would be cool...seeing Adie is just like seeing weird TV shows...haha

adik ka tlga Poli...

December 7, 2006 at 10:21:00 PM GMT+8  

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