Friday, March 30, 2007

Five Ways To Kill Summer Boredom

Ugh, this vacation's been dragging on longer than the Mahabharata, and April hasn't even started yet.

Apparently, boredom also decided to take a summer vacation--in our homes--unfortunately. So, I decided to make a list on how to force boredom to check-out of our one-star hotels that we call home--prematurely.

Before you pellet me with "Haha, I'm not bored; I've got tons of things to do" statements, read this first:

You might have fun things to do NOW but it won't last until June. You might say you're not bored NOW, but let me hear you say that again comes Labor Day.

Eventually, you'll run out of things to do AND YOU WILL GET B-O-R-E-D-!

Take this list seriously. Have it printed and keep it in your pocket--you might get bored sooner than you expect.

1. Go to Quiapo and buy an avalanche of DVDs. Anime, TV series, teleseryes, whatever--it doesn't matter. Literally, abuse your eyes by watching these day and night until your DVD player spews hot gases or until your lachrymal glands spurts blood. Remember to keep a vial of Visine near you.

Pros: You get to watch episodes you missed or old animes you just miss.
Cons: Your eyesight will go from 20-20 to 150(20-20). Distributive property fellas.

2. Learn to play the piano.

Pros: With constant practice, you'll be a Chopin in no time. You'll finally be able to play Waltz in A-Flat (Opus 39 No. 15) by Johannes Brahms. Oh, you like Waltz by Hale better? Good for you.
Cons: You don't have enough moolah to have piano lessons, let alone buy a piano.

3. Lose that gut; that salbabida around your waist! Be anorexic. Instead of sweeping away bits of paper and dead insects on the floor, wolf it down for lunch.

Pros: You'll lose a lot of weight and your parents will be spending less money for food.
Cons: You'll be anorexic.

4. Pretend you're Leon Kennedy or Jill Valentine (Resident Evil). Transform your house into a zombie infested mansion or police station. Get a pellet gun and fire away at the zombies (your little brothers/sisters). Make your way to the final boss--your mom. (can be Nemesis or Veronica, depending on what installment you're in) Use the kitchen knife to have a better shot in getting a rank S in the end.

Pros: No controllers involved here; just you and your zombie-ass-kicking-skills. Plus, you get extra costumes and weapons when you beat the game.
Cons: Ink ribbons doesn't seem to work well with your PC. And to make things worse, you only have a single red herb in your inventory during your encounter with the final boss. No greens and blues to mix it with.

Sorry, Gameshark won't work.

5. Perform a neurosurgery on yourself.

: By turning on your frontal lobes, you could eliminate the sense of boredom.
Cons: You die. At least it gets the job done.

I hope this list could help you get through this snooze-fest of a vacation.

Final Message: Do anything you want but apply for a summer job.

Just think of it, after we graduate, we'll be working our butts off until our hair turns salt and pepper. Plus, when we're already working, we won't be having this luxury (as boring as it is).

The irony. When you're young, you have the strength and the time but not the money. When you're working, you have the strength and money but not the time. And when you're a septuagenarian, you have the money and time but not the strength.

Forget about all the things I've written above. I'm just bored.


Anonymous arvee said...

lots of new admirers lately, eh bets? XD you keep that head of yours below the troposphere- al gore's wetting his pants already even without your hot air's participation in the global warming.. XD

6th tip for gagopolian to kill summer boredom: change his layout already XD

things werent very nice between you and your beds and pillows lately, huh? XD

April 1, 2007 at 2:15:00 AM GMT+8  
Anonymous betsy said...

you do first your "five ways to kill summer boredom" (esp. no. 5)then if effective...i'll follow.hehehe

April 1, 2007 at 3:10:00 PM GMT+8  
Anonymous mayi said...

haha.. i wana be anorexic... tsktsk...

April 2, 2007 at 4:28:00 PM GMT+8  
Anonymous hermione said...

Haha! I'll add some if you don't mind...

6. Visit the seaside and breathe and scare all the little crabs away

7. Climb a rock and roar like Lion King

8. Jog in the morning, 6-7 am! ^_^

9. CHase the dog until it chases you

10. Watch JUMONG! JHahahahah!

Well, it seems I'm getting myself knocked out in front of the tv lately. My ma kept on blabbering about Jumong (She actually have all the episodes. 9 discs, 20 episodes each - WTH?!)

Yup. I am killing my time with it... Haha. Maganda naman kuwento. Medyo mabagal nga lang.

Yang sinabi ko sa taas. Plano ko talaga. Si Jumong kasi, pinigilan akoh. x_x

Update na ulit! ^_^

April 2, 2007 at 8:20:00 PM GMT+8  
Anonymous miyuchi said...

haha! ayos to ah. I like the one with the Resident Evil kuno!

astig yun! gusto pumatay ng zombies! yun ang pam-patay ng boredom.

April 5, 2007 at 6:52:00 PM GMT+8  
Blogger Miguel said...

ayos blog naten ah...hehe, entertaining, really. kita ko lang comment mo sa blog ni miyuchi, and out of-- yes, boredom --, i fooled around for a bit and somehow ended on your page.

April 6, 2007 at 9:14:00 AM GMT+8  
Anonymous hermione said...

WOW! ganda naman ng layout moh! pero bakit ganun, wala nang pang-chatbox?!?! tuloy kelangan kong magresort dito?!?!


asteegin! kulang nalang, bagong update! ^_^

April 8, 2007 at 8:33:00 PM GMT+8  

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