Can You Guess Who Am I?

How well do you know our past and present professors? Answer the following riddles through the comments section. I'll be posting the answers and scoring guide soon.

1. I give endless references...endless topics to read but I end up discussing the story of my life instead. I'm always late like the owner of this blog. My wardrobe consists of curtains, bedsheets and blankets. I'm a bit sexy. Can you guess who am I?

2. My favorite color is purple. My pens, stamps, clothes, panties and bras are all purple--even my shadow is purple. I gave birth to Grimace. Can you guess who am I?

3. Uno, dos, tres...TRES ESTRELLAS! "Okay guys" say tres estrellas! Guys I would like to plug my show. Guys, it's on Nickelodeon. I always wear a pink shirt and orange shorts with a pearl bracelet to match. My best friend, Boots is always in the computer lab. Guys, can you guess who am I?

4. You think you own Santo Tomas? No, no, no, no, no! I OWN SANTO TOMAS! The moment I sit on my throne I expect total silence from you--I should hear the ants breathe. You can't object to what I'm saying because I'm always right. You should just nod in agreement to every word that comes out of my mouth. My favorite hobby is flunking students and making grand walk-outs. Can you guess who am I? Ha? Ano, ha?

5. My favorite students are Miss Sabigan, Dyohan and Miss Galisyo. I dwell in the Thomas Aquinas Research Center where I'm the queen. I went to Bontoc last summer to fulfill my biggest dream--to do wild and tantric sex with a certain (chubby) Sociology professor in the muds of Banawe Rice Terraces. Did you hear mass last Sunday in the tsurtz? I hope so because you'll be sharing your favorite gospels. And why don't you go first, Miss...Sabigan? I'm young, hip and pretty. Can you guess who am I?

6. I'm the final evolution of Jigglypuff. I can put anyone to sleep with my songs about doctrines. I'm God's gift to insomniacs. What? You don't know who's Jiggylpuff? Well try googol-ing it! Can you guess who am I?

7. I'm a part-time professor and a full-time hairdresser. Do you see my perfect curls? It took me three hours to achieve this. My paper for my masteral course meanwhile, took thirty seconds to copy-paste. A former Miss International and I have very similar qualities. First, we look alike. Second, we think alike. Can you guess who am I?

Part 2 coming soon!

Operation Gagopolis: Exposing Hermione's Identity

There's an entity lurking in my blog that calls himself/herself Hermione.

In spite of persistent inquiry, Hermione shows no interest in disclosing her identity. I've already asked my friends who Hermione is but all I got was a shrug and a defensive "Hindi ako yon!"

Betty initially claimed that he knew who Hermione is but disclaimed it later on saying, "Hindi ko talaga kilala yun Betty. Kinausap ko lang siya sa chat box." Fuck you Betty. You're so helpful you know?

Nobody wants to tell me who Hermione is. Nobody wants to admit that HE is Hermione. If that's the case then, I might as well dig the dirt myself.

List of possible Hermiones:

1. Betty - Very high probability. Inconsistent statements and simply because he's Betty.
2. Ana Mae - Low probability. Uses "amaegan" as her nick.
3. Hagrid - High probability. Uses different nicks in different blogs.
4. Ms. Prezzy - Very low probability. She'll never do such thing. But who knows?
5. Papa Sam - Very low probability. He'll NEVER do such thing. But yet again, who knows?
6. Louise - Low probability. I can feel it's not her. (psychic?)
7. Joy - High probability. She's the only one I know who calls me "poly-toot." But then, she doesn't visit my blog.
8. Ge - High probability. Albeit denying and threatening me of punching me in the face.
9. Parpie - Low probability. Capable of doing such thing. I don't see any pokpok before my name so I doubt if it's her.
10. Betsy - Very high probability. Betsy is just one of those powerful beings. She can do anything. Scary. And she's curly nowadays--it means she's up to something.

Out of these 10, I chose three. Drum roll please...

=?

=?

=?

This is one's very tough to call. If only Hermione's considerate enough to admit his real identity; I wouldn't be doing all these shit.

Please! Please! Please!

I need to get out of here ASAP; Project Runway 2 finale is almost starting.

Hey, why don't you guys vote for the suspect?

Cast your vote in the comments section. Votes cast in the Chat Box will not be counted.

I'll tally the votes and make a Frequency Distribution table afterwards.

Voting starts...NOW!

What I'm Really Thinking About During Stat...

Our professor in Stat noticed that we're virtually wiping off drool from our faces during his lecture yesterday. So he urged us to make a protest to the admin or CHED to remove math courses from our curriculum since we won't be applying them in our future jobs anyway. He says it's our right to do so.

But I don't have the urge. I feel contented as it is. I feel indifferent. I'm a good example of a bad Filipino citizen--not fighting for his own rights.

I admire activists because they have the guts to do what they're doing even if the price they have to pay is their own lives. They stand firm on what they believe in and they don't yield to the pressures of society.

I hate pseudo-activists: the ones jumping on the bandwagon, the ones holding banners they don't even understand, the ones who rally for the sake of rallying and the ones vanishing in thin air when confronted with a water cannon.

It's disgusting.

But it sure beats being indifferent.

Aaaarrrggghhh!!!

When I got hold of the Journalese this morning, I found out that somehow, I managed to get my name published in it. There it was on the back page, colossally printed in Verdana: "five. nararamdaman ko lang sila pag may acquaintance party at kung ano-anong pageants-allan ray policarpio, 2jrn1" This when asked to rate JrnSoc's performance; one being the highest and five, the lowest.

I would not be surprised if I see a pill box stashed inside my bag or an insect repellant tablet sandwiched between the mango slice and crab stick inside the maki I would be devouring tomorrow (maybe I should give Betty the poisoned ones).

Nevertheless, I'm so happy that all my thrash-talking finally got me somewhere. Maybe this is what I'm destined to do. Maybe I should pursue a career in it. Maybe I should do it--now.

The Journalese was fine. But it can do without the opinion columns written by _______ and _______. After reading them, I wondered how these articles made it into the printing press. The grammar's all screwed up; they can't even distinguish a noun from an adjective. But I commend them for being able to write a long article consisting of repeated ideas--that's hard.

"Why would we care? Because we are human beings..."- Thanks for the information though. It answered the question that has been bugging me for the last eighteen years of my existence. This is easily the quote of the year.


In fairness, the other four columns were very well written. Kudos.

Last time I checked, MS Word suggests corrections for grammatical errors. Maybe the Grammar Check system crashed because it can't handle all the errors. Oh well...

Okay, so you will argue that Journalese is after all, a training ground where we could improve our skills (if we have any) and eliminate mistakes. But at least, train someone who has something to improve on. I have friends more deserving of the space in that newsletter (like betty. o ayan betty something positive!).

By this time you're probably pelleting me with phrases such as: "ang yabang mo!", "bakit mas magaling ka ba?", "sige nga, sulat ka nga" and "no one is perfect".

I admit, I'm not that good--yet. I think I have to practice harder before writing for a paper. That explains why I'm here criticizing (bashing) the newsletter and not writing for it.

And they're proposing that the UST Journalism Department be made into a Center of Excellence?

LOL

It says there that a major requirement would be a newsroom; I would say good writers.

Who Wants A Manny Pacquiao-Vina Morales face-off ?

Woohoo!

In just three rounds, Manny kicked Erik's ass into retirement--great, great. But three rounds of boxing is not worth the wait. The match probably lasted for an hour -- nine minutes of boxing and fifty-one minutes of advertisement.

After watching the match, a certain person kept popping in my head...


... Vina Morales.

With all those muscles, she could have knocked-out Manny very easily by just using her pinky. Seriously, she should consider donating some of it to Erik Morales, who looked like Gumby. Erik was still lucky though as he didn't have to face Vina because even her bellybutton is more muscular than his arms. Thanks to Enerva -- ang energy drink ng Pilipina.




Question.

Who are the six members of The Hunks?

Piolo

Carlos

Bernard

Jericho

Diether

And...

...Vina

Yes, Vina is a member of The Hunks.

Remember when Bernard left The Hunks? He left the group because he was intimidated by Vina the Gladiatress. One day in a gym, while Bernard was lifting a 150 lbs barbell, she spotted Vina two stations away, also lifting weights--two 50 lbs dumbbell. Two dumbbells? 50 lbs each? What's the big deal? Well, Vina is lifting the weights using not her hands but her...eyelids.

You want a good match? Then bring in Manny and Vina on the Ring!

Now, If I could just blow Vina off my brain...

Let's just celebrate Manny's victory!

0% crime rate that day...amazing.

Mabuhay si Manny! Manny for President!

My First Post...

Sa wakas nakagawa na ako ng blog. Pero hindi pa ako lubos na naliligayahan. Para kasing pang-kinder ang template ng blog ko.

Kaya naman nananawagan ako sa mga bloggers diyan na may ginintuang puso na magbibigay sa akin ng kung hindi man maganda, ay disenteng template man lang o skin o kung anumang kaletsehan ang tawag dun.

Huwag niyong sasabihing pumunta ako sa "blogskins." Muntik na akong magsagawa ng brain surgery sa sarili dahil sa sakit sa ulo.

Salamat!